been cramped up with programs for this whole week and the next... it's good in the sense that i can at least come in late for fyp meetings and even to the extend of skipping it... =) now that's good... but then again... it's making me too busy... it's the busiet holiday ever... and there's more to come... and that sucks... i need a break... pronto...

so here's what's bee going on for the past few days...

tuesday: FOP matriculation thingy with jas and my boy.. pulling people into the camp... and wearing formal for that... looking retarded and feeling retarded in it... had to walk up to those people and ask what course they all in... and when they are not in the school of science... we don't say anything further.. and this day became a special day for me and him... ^^ i'm lovin' it...

wednesday: the usual... FYP... harvest flies... culture flies... and then... journal club... how boring... but at least i know my flies are doing well... and that's another happy day for me...

thursday: matriculation thingy again... this time... me and boyfriend just sat there the time we were there doing nothing but talking with others while the person in charged of this publicity thingy did the work... so in other words... we wasted time there.. then it was journal again... next stop... my place... that's for me and jas only... guys went over to big ben's place... dinner at 85 together with hui cheng a.k.a the auntie who insist of being a xiao jie =P then it was back home with jas to play dynasty warriors still our fingers started blistering... or rather... only mine did... i think... =)

friday: FOP dry for OSG... another FOP thingy... [ fyi: tuesday and thursday was FOP for science people.. this FOP is for the whole school...] left the dry run thingy after seeing the program sheet and thought it was crap... so jas went for her lab... while me giff big ben and boyfriend went swimming... i didn't want to initially cos i wasn't dressed appropriately but i got pulled in... = oh wells... after that... it was to giff's place... supposed to be playing mahjong... but cos everyone was tired... we slept all the way till in the evening... and dinner at KFC... ages since i've gone to KFC to eat...

thanks baby for the honey stars... =) it may be just a cereal... but at least you remembered that it's my favourite cereal... =) honey stars with lots of love and extra sweetness... <3

program for today: birthday dinner with the class... the main guy's the walking encycopedia... julius... happy birthday dude... =)

Labels: overflowing love for me from you ^.^

today's a happy happy day... SAS FOP camp briefing ended early... so i had so much time to spare and do nothing... so went to the library to watch dong fang zhi zhu... nice show... you peeps should go check it out... hong kong dramas are the best.. =)) journal club went surprisingly smooth for me... i didn't need to stone much... and so FYP meeting ended at 3.. just as scheduled... ahhhhhh.... i love such days... now who says mondays gives you the blues all the time... =D next was TMNT... ooooooyeaaaaaa.... cute show... though it's more about the turtles having family problems then saving the world against villians... but oh wells... michael angelo's darn cute... ralphael(if that's how you spell it..) super attitude yet cool... leonardo's just very big brotherish...(doh... he's the oldest if i'm not wrong...) and danotello(don't know how to spell...) is just plain smart... overall show rating... not too bad... rather boring at some parts... but darn funny at many... =) TMNT!!!!! woooohooooo!!!!

what's tomorrow schedule's like? be up by 6 reach woodlands by 7.45 in school by 8.15 journal club at 2... end time? who knows... hopefully it's another happy day for me... besides the fact that i'm gonna cam whore doing the matriculation thingy cos i'm gonna be wearing formal clothes... plenty of plasters to be prepared for me tomorrow... i know i'll just be blistered all over... just like i'm having bruises popping out all over my legs, hands and head... don't ask me how i get them... i just do... i think i'm sick... =

i'm heading for my bed now... long day ahead... adios... chao... bye... sayonara... zuoi kin... zhai jian... ooseegay... lastly... bon nuit!

Labels: happy sunny day

i'm a unreasonable petty bitch that always insist on my own way and have an ego as huge as the size of an elephant and will never give in like a spoilt brat... so what??






SUE ME!!

Labels: flies i peace with you (=

hols are filled with only fyp meetings and more fyp meetings... i seriously have no life... life's all about my stupid flies that refuse to survive... how entertaining is that... argh!!!!! STUPID FLIES!!! GO EAT YOUR OWN SHIT... but please don't die... (like they'll actually listen to me... =)

watched mr bean the movie... it's funny... it's ubber funny in fact... no storyline... yet funny... and the french woman's pretty... =) watched stomp the yard too... the dancing's woohoo... but the main story's kinda draggy and boring... the show coming up... TMNT!!! woooooohooooooooo!!!!! ah ling jie jie said it's nice... though she said they didn't use the theme song and reviews said it's too childish... but doh... it's a children cartoon... it's meant to be childish and yet cool... i'm still gonna go ahead with watching it... (=

i have nothing to say anymore... i have nothing to write... oh wells... by the way.... journals are instant knock outs... try reading if you've got insomnia... it helps... =) great sleeping tips... haha... byebyeeeeee

Labels: no labels

How to touch a girl-JoJo

Mmm

I think I could like you

I already do
Feelings can grow but
They can go away too
You're takin my hand
Lookin into my eyes
Don't be in a rush to
Get me tonight

Feel somethin happenin
Could this be a spark?
To satisfy me baby
Gotta satisfy my heart

Do you know how to touch a girl?
If you want me so much
First I have to know
Are you thoughtful and kind?
Do you care what's on my mind?
Or am I just for show?
You'll go far in this world
If you know how to touch a girl

Do you know how to touch, know how to touch a girl?
Do you know how to touch, know how to touch a girl?

I think I could like you
But I keep holding back
Cause I can't seem to tell
If you're fiction or fact
Show me you can laugh
Show me you can cry
Show me who you really are
Deep down inside

Do you feel somethin happenin?
Could this be for real?
I don't know right now but tonight we'll reveal

Do you know how to touch a girl?
If you want me so much
First I have to know
Are you thoughtful and kind?
Do you care what's on my mind?
Or am I just for show?
You'll go far in this world
If you know how to touch a girl

Bring me some flowers
Conversation for hours
To see if we really connect
And baby if we do
Ooh I'll be givin all my love to you
Ohh

Do you know how to touch a girl?
If you want me so much
First I have to know
Are you thoughtful and kind?
Do you care what's on my mind?
Or am I just for show?
You'll go far in this world
If you know how to touch a girl

Do you know how to touch, know how to touch a girl? (Yeah, yeah)
Do you know how to touch, know how to touch a girl?

You'll go far in this world
If you know how to touch a girl

the songs just speaks my mind...

i'm having a bad tummy these days... what goes in just comes out immediately... it's kinda irritating... i don't feel full at all... it's making me hungry all the time but i wouldn't be able to eat cos it'll be gone anyway... i shall just starve myself till bad tummy goes away... unwanted dieting... =

i'm supposed to be back at my proposal for my FYP and refining the experiment protocol for tomorrow but i'm drifting away.... *sigh* i needa get on track again... i shouldn't be playing anymore... i should be getting serious and no more haa haa hee hee... but then again.. i can't... cos i'm just too drifted away to do that...

relationships are a hassle... i guess i'm enjoying the way things are now... there don't seem to be any commitment needed and no one really gets hurt if something happens... or will there be? it's hard to say i guess... but i doubt there really is... cos things are in a situation where it seems like something has started but sometimes feel that actually it's nothing and occassionally on the verge of starting... so what is the situation actually i'm not entirely sure... just make the best of it i suppose... i like it the way it is now... prolly cos i'm too afraid to commit... what good it is to be so committed and then realized that it's actually just something that's not here not there... aye... relationships... always a hassle... always a heartache... always a problem... yet people just can't help getting into one... then again... am i in one now? that's really hard to say... i think i'm neither here nor there... just letting things fall into place with nature and flowing with it... =)

going back to doing my protocol again... what a bore... yet a necessity... oh wells...

Labels: whatever will be will be...

supposed to be refining my proposal and protocol for alvin later but apparently i'm not doing so... i can't focus... i'm so lost in my own world and thoughts and just wanna go play my hearts out till i drop dead and then be back to do my FYP happily again... but obviously things ain't gonna be that way... sigh...

chalet was on from monday to wednesday.. it's a fun chalet... until i got drunk... now that really ain't fun... in fact it's kinda embarrassing... i'm not supposed to get wasted... = anyhoo... i got wasted and had lots of videos of me being silly... and i really wanna bury myself whever they're playing the videos... it really isn't very nice to see... i'm shy okay... hahaha... by the end of the chalet... i was dead tired... i slept throughout wednesday the moment i got home... and went to bed ubber early... like 9 plus... really really early... and of course in the end i woke up ubber early too... but it got boring to be up early in the morning that i went back to sleep... haha... so that's how i wasted my day... hahahaha... bad thing though... i came back with lots of bruises... and it's really ugly... =( they're gonna take at least a week to go away... =( ugly hands...

i'm not very sure if i've fallen... it's very complicating that i don't even know what i should make out of it... i'm refusing to let history repeats itself... i'm refusing to admit that something is happening... i'm having a phobia... i'm quite mixed up now... yet i know i must pretend that there won't be anything happening... let's just say i'm insecure about myself... i don't trust myself enough to sink any deeper... i can't leave my comfort zone... i just can't bear to know that history will repeat itself... i like to be in denial... i wanna be in denial... it'll past... somehow... hopefully... or maybe when there's finally an affirmation then i can start stepping out... till then i wanna deny whatever there is that i can... i will not fall... maybe just stumble... but i can't fall... i'm a goner if i fell... i know i'll be...
deny deny deny deny deny deny deny deny deny deny deny deny deny

cottage with a flower bed in front and beach at the back and an orchard by the side of the house and an oak tree with a tree house and a diy swing attached to it around the front of the house... a barnyard just a few miles down just enough to go riding every morning... is that what all girls dream houses are like? i'll have many girls fighting with me for land then... yikes... i like the suburbian life... why does most girls like that too... oh wells... shows that i'm just a typical girl... time to have a change of dream houses... =)

Labels: hardest bling blings are what i need now

FYP stress is taking it's toll on me...
i can't stand it anymore...
Alvin's driving nuts...
i don't know what i'm doing anymore...
i'm gonna go bonkers...
i have bad grades...
i'm bad at these things...
poly's not suppose to be this bad...
this is not going to be a good year ain't it?
i'm snapping at people when i know i shouldn't...
i want all these to end now...
it's not going to that soon...
how am i gonna survive the rest of the last year in this dreaded school?
how am i gonna stop feeling so uneasy all over everyday every minute everysecond?
so many things on my mind...
so many things i wanna scream out...
i'm suffocating...
argh!!!!!!
what's the point...
i ranting and ranting and snapping and frowning and faking and dreaming...
yet i'm getting no where...
aye..
aye...
aye....
i need a shrink...
i need anti-depressants...
i need a place to hide away and disappear for a long while till i think i'm fit to be back again...
but i can't...
i can never...
i don't have the luck of it...
*sigh*
i'm a loner...
i'll drown myself in misery...
drown myself with pills...
the depression's talking now...
yikes..