i'm at the library now... and i'm supposedly to be studying for my UT for microbio... the last UT of year 2 and sem... i gave up reading after awhile... my attention shifted to something else... and that's playing a flower shop game... =S i'm not concentrating... although that's the idea of coming to the library to study... oh my.... help!!!! okay... so no one's gonna help me... *sigh* so now... i'm back to the intention of studying... or at least a little understanding of what i've been doing for the past few lessons... i don't wanna have an F in my grades... Cell Culture UT3's grade was really a shocker to me... a F appeared and i almost choked... somehow my answers didn't make sense anymore when i saw them again... it's scary... and i can't let that happen again... that's the first F i ever gotten for 4 whole sems... scary... anyways... hopefully that'll be the last of the Fs coming my way... i can't let that happen... that's why i'm gonna start studying like hell again... =X i'm gonna go mad one of these days till i'm out of school... =S

went and help out at the open house yesterday... and it wasn't that much fun... it's not as happening as last year i must say... everything was quiet and not much activity going on... except of course when i'm at the SAS booth with my classmates then we started all the nonsense... talking rubbish... poking around... disturbing the facs on duty or off duty... and time past real fast there... it's kinda surprising... i almost didn't turn up for this thingy... partly cos i couldn't get up... and when i did... i would be late... but i took a cab down... and needed Jasmine to pay for my cab fare... cos i didn't have cash with me.. i actually didn't want her to pay for me... cos i just didn't like the idea of it... but she insisted... so i had no choice but to come... i just don't have the enthusiasm of hers to attend such school events i guess... sure i did sign up... but somehow when the day comes... i just don't feel like going... it's not very appealing in the end... call me irresponsible or what... but sometimes it's just like that... not everytime enthusiasm hits me... especially when it comes to going back to school during a break... no one in the right mind would do that except school lovers... i obviously dread going to school... it's just not in my like list... *shrugs*

supper with tashie later... =) with joyce... =)) it's double the smiles for me... and joyce's coming to the library first to do some studying too... hopefully when she's here... i would suddenly get into the studying mode again... *silly grin* it's nice to have a studying partner sometimes... hehe... so that when it gets boring... there'll be some company... =D

long weekend for me... RP open house... how good is that... i'd say totally... loving those days when i don't have to go school... i just found out that this sem... i didn't skip much of school... seriously... normally i would have used up my leaves by now... but miraculously... i made it... so now... i have leaves to take if i want to... how cool is that... it also shows one thing... school's much better in the 2nd sem i guess... and i gotta admit... it was kinda good this sem... the class's not so foreign compared to the previous ones... and i'm thankful for that... 4 more weeks... and back to strangers when school reopens... but then again... who cares... the holidays come first... then it'll means my final year has come... and it also means i'm screwed for FYP and PP... yucks!! i'll grad fast... i have a feeling that this year's gonna be a short and fast year... on second thought... i always feel that way... =) no more RP soon... yay!!

i've cooped myself at home for 2 days already... and i'm gonna do it again the following 3 days to come... skipping monday since i have to go school for the open house thingy which i signed up with Jasmine... and i feel perfectly fine doing that... people actually feel bored cooping themselves at home and not doing anything productive... and yet... i feel absolutely fine and in fact satisfied... i guess i just don't have that sense of being productive eh... oh well... i need to get started on studying for my UT then... weeks of endless test coming my way after the open house long weekend... and before i know it... it's the holidays and Chinese New Year... i should be glad... i've got to focus... just focus... focus till i can't anymore and start falling into depression and seclusion once again... and no one will understand why... *shrugs*

i'm not gonna spend anymore unnecessary money anymore... i've flat broke and it's high time that i should save... my parents are right... i shouldn't be spending every cent i have whenever i do have them like i'll not live tomorrow... it's just not right... i need to get that into my head... i'm gonna be budget... real budget... maybe i should go back to having packed lunch everyday... or better stilll 1 meal per day... which means no food till i get home from school... i'll probably die of gastric pain one of these days.. but it doesn't matter... every dollar save is worth it... or is it not? whichever... i'm gonna save and dollar i get... and it'll come to a point where i'l become so used to it that i've become a miser without knowing... but it's for the best i suppose... now does any of these make sense to you?

i've come to a conclusion about liking a person... and that's never to tell a person that you like him/her/it/whatever... it just becomes weird... the best way to resolve such silly matters... is to deny them... friends are always better than lovers... they'll not make you cry... they'll not hurt you that much... and they're not that trouble-worry if there's such a thing... the bottomline is... they don't last any longer than dinosaurs on earth... it's so random to actually say something on such topics... prolly the early morning thoughts that happens to cross my mind... it's 4am... it's the timing... i'm not thinking normal as i should... but seriously... when you like someone... never express it... especially for girls... cos it gets scary to the guys... unless of course... you're really sure how the other guy/girl/it/whatever feels about you... why have unnecessary disappointment... and heartbreaks... and mixed feelings... and lose a friend in that process eh? always go for reaasurance... it's the safest...

i'm going off to bed now then... who knows when will i suddenly write something again.... this entry was entered only cos my hair isn't dry.. though i did meant to write many times in many days... but just couldn't bring myself to... and i have no idea why... it beats me... so since my hair's half dried already... maybe it's time for me to stop ranting and saying things that doesn't seem to make sense at all... or just simply being so random...

chao... bon nuit! and bonjour!


P.S: Andy Lau's my love by the way... where can i ever find someone like him besides himself and Richard Gere and Daniel Wu... i'm being shallow now... shoot me...

it's get boring when i have to wait for time to past in the lab.... there's nothing that can be done... then i'll start to get sleepy... in fact... i am already sleepy... i ubber sleepy... i had to drag myself out of bed today... but of course... that's no surprise... slept in the wee hours again even though i said i would sleep early... i can't wait for this stupid day to end... =X aye... i don't like school... there's UT on the first day of school... how crappy is that... oh well... so many complains... never ending... *sigh*

i'm having a crappy health now too... nose's blockked... voice is gonna be gone... ears're blocked... constant tiredness... never ending headaches making the world spin around me again and again... =S it's horrible... how nice of that at the beginning of the year... aye... sucky... i feel sucky.. i feel cranky... i wanna go HOME!!!!!!! if i don't feel any better by this weekend... i think i've got to cancel my night lie with Tashie... out in the afternoon on her birthday but at night i'll head home to sleep... that's if situation doesn't improve... =)

so drained... though i haven't done anything the whole day yet except reading the protocol out to my lab mates... and answering the little questions in the worksheet... i realized i don't know much of what the hell i'm doing... Joyce is right... one of those wednesdays... i'm gonna tell her that i'm gonna go mugging at the library instead of going out with her and doing mindless stuff... though i'm not complaining... but i really got to be serious with my studies already... i'm lagging behind so much... it's tough trying to be a walking encycopedia... too much info to be stuffed in the head... it's madness... how do those people actually do that...

i'm done... done with everything... i'm gonna shut out now... byebye...
bonjour...

it's the 3rd day of the 2007 now... and it means going back to school soon... shucks... i hate that... i'm not prepared to go school... i'm not prepared for UTs... i'm not prepared for FYP or PP or anything... i haven't rest enough... i'm not mentally prepared or physically as a matter of fact... I'M SO NOT PREPARED!!!!!
okay... enough of all those whining about not going school and hating school... on the brighter side i'm 1 more year away of getting out of RP!!! i should smile for that... =)

new year's eve was spent with my darling Joyce and her company... which are a bunch of secondary school people that once were in my class but i don't really remember them and hope they'll pardon me for that... =) i'm not doing it intentionally... it's just that images of people i know who slip off if i don't see them often... so yeah... please understand that... if you see me on the street and you said hi and i give you that quizzical stare... don't be surprise and just either give me a moment to recall who you are or just tell me... i'll try my best to think back and remember... =)

as i was saying i spent it with them and yeah... counted down at MOS... no fireworks for me this year... just smoke... balloons... deafening music and alcohol.... oh... and sticky bodies around me... *yuck* but it was quite okay... prolly something different for a change... but i still like counting down with fireworks best... =)

new year's day and the second day of 2007 was spent idling at home and getting all the rest that i can... though i don't seem to be feeling any more energized... and my dark circles seems to get worse... and my room's still in a mess... though my room being in a mess has nothing to do with me not getting enough rest... just a random thing... haha... so here are a few things i've got to get things done in this new year...
1) get PP done obviously... or i'll never get out of that school...
2) get a new chair for my room...
3) losing all those stupid fats...
4) making sure that Poxie gets the best of his life...
5) better grades of course... or i'll never get into the uni and that'll be the end of me...
6) save money for the rainy days and maybe a holiday to visit my darling... =)
7) FYP partner? anybody wanna be mine? yes... i'm pathetic... i don't have a group yet... so why not help me and be my team mate...
8) exercising rain or shine
9) no more late night snacking..
10) sleeping early... those dark circles just gotta go...
i think that's the top 10 i got to do... this year... i've got to be realistic... i can't list 20 and get 5 done by the end of the year can i... so yeah... i'm being super realistic here by just listing 10... and i'll complete my resolutions... i'm gonna put it up somewhere... for now... i need a new organizer and a wall calendar to keep track of things... =) so much of saving money eh... hehe...

i think i ought to sleep now... i'm going singing with my darling tomorrow... *beams* love doing things with her... byebye people... bon nuit! or rather... bonjour!